Having to admit that your marriage is over is one of the hardest things you will ever have to do. Forever is a tough bond to try and break. For that reason it is important you for you to what you can to make the transition as easy as possible on you and your spouse. The harder aspect of divorce is when there are kids involved. They are never the reason a couple splits up but they often blame themselves. Things only get worse when both parents begin a legal fight over who gets to keep the kids. It’s one of the hardest aspects of the process but it doesn’t have to be difficult.
The best approach when dealing with children in a divorce is to keep the kids in the same environment. Moving them out of the house or transferring schools is many times a knee jerk reaction to the pain of a divorce. Of course this idea flies out the window if there is any sense that the children could be in danger because of the other spouse. But in most cases it’s about selfishness and not selflessness. For that reason the children should stay right where they are. It’s in the best interest of everyone.
Of course being a parent isn’t easy when you are at odds with the other parent. This is where parents begin competing for the children’s affection. This is a silly way to behave and one that will only result in the child resenting one parent and it could be you. Don’t make the mistake of telling a child that there other parent is a bad person. Be sensitive to how much this process is hurting them. They have to know they are loved first and foremost. Without that the child will hate themselves for what is happening and won’t hate you. It’s your job to make them feel loved and supported at all times.